In case you all don't know, EVERYBODY is talking about this episode of the Tyra Banks Show. This is how bad it is: I don't even watch TV and I heard about it. Don't get reception at my house and don't have cable but I've seen it. The episode is divided into 5 videos and you can click on the one posted above to see number 1. (If it's still available by the time you read this) You can find the rest at Youtube and the show was interesting to say the least.
First of all I have to commend Tyra for even touching this story. Tyra lives and works in an industry that perpetuates this idea of good hair vs bad hair in the black community. Kinky black hair is seen as a novelty, something exotic when depicted in magazine and print. In the world at large the view is much less flattering. I don't feel her show in its format did near an adequate job of addressing this painful issue that runs so deep in the black community. The show opened all kinds of cans of worms and left them all laying there wiggling with no real closure. This subject is so hyper charged, many are saying Oprah would have done a better job. I disagree. I see real potential for Tyra here. I can't imagine how any adult could view this show and not be disturbed in their spirit, especially after hearing what children as young as 4 years old have to say on the matter about their self esteem. If she can do this one right it will catapult her into a whole other league and I can see it happening. As is stands, there is no way she can leave this story as is. It seems assured that she will come back to this and I hope she does.
I won't recap because the whole show was such a hot mess this post would go on forever if I did. I'm going tro summerize it down. Afrikkan hair as I've discussed before is what is referred to as bad hair. Kinky, nappy, kitchens, brillo and other terms are used to describe our natural hair as is. Back in the days of slavery having 'good' hair meant you actually got to work and live IN the house. You served guests, it meant better food, better treatment from other whites, warmth, etc. It meant you were probably a son or daughter of the master who was mixing it up with one of his slaves. The hair would be fairer, less curly, more like whites, etc. This was considered good hair and people often refered to folks with this kind of hair as 'houseniggas,' a term that in some places is still used today. As you can probably guess this created a strong divide within the black community and some hostility. Sometimes fairer blacks considered themselves better than the others and acted accordingly.
Conversely, kinky hair blacks were often bitter and resentful towards those of fairer complexions and hair grade and would often shun or even abuse fairer blacks. The poor treatment of kinky haired blacks, the way we were viewed, scorned and parodied was a major contributor to this hostility. This attitude unfortunately transaltes all the way up to today. Kinky haired blacks are still viewed as unpolished, jive talking, unprofessional, low class, ugly, dirty, etc. simply because of the natural state of our hair. We quickly learned that with nappy hair it doesn't matter how educated we are, how well we speak, how much we achieve or how well we dress - there was no way we would move ahead or be taken serioulsy unless we conform. To look professional, to be considered beautiful and get ahead in life the way to go was to get your hair straightened.
Straightening is mainly achieved by getting one's hair chemically relaxed. A cream relaxer is placed on the hair and scalp. This chemical breaks the hair down, basically burning the kinks out, and most times part of your scalp along with it. Adults and even children endure this pain every 6 to 8 weeks without blinking. It's pretty much a standard of living just like getting gas for your car. There are people in life who wouldnt be caught dead with naps in their hair. You wouldnt catch them with kinks showing at their roots and they speak poorly of those who don't straighten or who let their hair go too long without a touch-up relaxer at their new roots. In order to look fly you had to have the straight shiny hair that moves when you move even though that is not how our hair is naturally. My own mother hates to see my hair in its natural state.
There is this movement now to stand up and reclaim our nappy roots by any means necessary and fight back the mental slavery to conform. I've been bumming around the scene for a bit, watching videos on youtube, subscribing to a few online communities for encouragement and style tips. I've even raised a militant fist or two in my travels but as time goes on I find myself petering out with this gung ho attitude. For you nappy haired purists don't worry. This doesn't mean I'm looking at going back to relaxers or straightening. I admit that at this stage in my developement I've become bored and discouraged with the look of my hair. My goal is to grow it out so I'm sticking with it, but in the meantime I feel ugly and not my usual glamourous self. Just not the 'me' I'm used to I guess. Maybe it's just a lighter or darker shade of self hatred or something, I don't know, but there it is. I don't want straight hair I just my hair to be less kinky because right now it appears too short now. Grow dammit, grow!!
What occurs to me is that hair is just hair. Whites do crazy assed stuff to their hair all the time to twist it, perm it, color it, cut it, shave it in to whatever they want. Nobody gives them a hard time about their heritage or whatever about it. It's considered a form of artistic self expression. In the rush to reclaim our identities I think we should be careful not to exchange one rule of mental slavery for another. Examining ourselves and our hair choices need not involve a change in style habits or stem from the grade of our hair in its natural state at all. It might only require a re examination of the way we view others because of their hair or skin tone. We need to eliminate words like "housenigga" and "jigaboo" from our vocabulary and embrace ourselves and each other as is. That's the way I feel. Hair is hair and we have choices, choices we should be free to make without being judged or labeled. That's my feeling on the issue and I thought it would have been nice if Tyra wrapped the show up in a neat little bow and presented the ideas like that. That's not how it went down though.
I think that in a perfect world that would have been a perfect ending but as you all know we don't live in a perfect world. The one disturbing story in this show was of one little girl on the panel. She was the only one who had natural kinky hair. It was done up in little braids with bows and cute little holders. She hated her hair and so did every other child on the panel. She carried with her a Hanna Montana wig which she said she wanted to wear all the time because she felt she and her hair were ugly. She was only happy when she had that rediculous wig on top of her head and you could see her change right before your eyes when she put it on. It was heartbreaking to hear the little girl talk about her own hair with such shame, dispair and sadness.
Tyra wore her hair in cornrows for the show. She didn't have her usual weave extensions to make her hair look long and straight. At one point in the show Tyra showed pictures of herself as a little girl and how kinky her hair was. Probably not as kinky as the little girl doing the talking but I digress. Her hair was done similarly in little braids and she tried to convince the girl that her hair was beautiful. The girl said she wanted to wear the Hanna wig all the time. Tyra created a nice little train wreck and nervous laughter in the audience by saying she also owns a Hanna Montana wig and wears it all the time. That seemed an awful lot like a slam to her own natural hair that just seconds earleir she was trying to convince a 5 year old was pretty. It was like a smack in the head with a true-by-four. Tyra is in an industry where she wouldnt be Tyra without her wigs and extensions. Underneath it all she's a nappy headed girl just like the little one with quivering lip before her but she can't be that and still be considered beautiful and be successful. And to speak the truth meant telling the little girl that everything she thinks about the salvation in that Hanna wig is true. Tyra is living it every day.
There was another little girl on the show who had long black straight hair. Looked like chemical to me but whatever. The little black girl's hair went down to the backs of her knees practically. She complained of kids in school pulling out chunks of her hair, picking on her and saying her hair smells like boo boo. Horrible story and so sad. As sad as the other girl's story. Tyra then responded to her by saying that the other kids were just jealous - with the first girl sitting right there with the Hanna wig flopped on top of her head. Her responses to the girls didn't do much good I don't think.
Here's a little pet peeve of mine that I've never voiced. I notice that whites often are strongly in favor of black women going natural. There is sometimes a fascinationg with our hair and some have even said they wish their hair was as versatile. This enthusiasm rubs me the wrong way sometimes. I wasn't sure why and felt a little taken aback by it. I think what is most irritating to me is the fact that our hair is still a novelty. Whites will often walk up to me and touch my hair unprovoked and uninvited. With grins on their faces they will go on and on about how fascinating my hair is and how it's always in a different style. Now granted I've raved about how unique some woman's natural/unnatural color is or how much I love the cut or the style. I've complimented a nice 'do that seemed flattering on someone but there is never a 'You People' feel to my compliments. "You white folks and your hairstyles. So fascinating the things you can do." Somehow to me that seems demeaning.
But I digress. I feel the Tyra show fell short of addressing this issue in a neat little package. In her defense though, doing so was a tough job. Especially in view of all those children on the show and the demons they have at such a tender age already about their hair. I'm not certain even Tyra has examined it closely herself and may have been a bit caught off guard with her exploratory mission. I think we have a long way to go as a community. I do hope Tyra tackles the subject again.
